When someone hears about “relationship”, there are two different perspectives. First one, the “fairytale” and the “love in the air” idea. Second, hurt and heartbreaks. Let’s dig deeper, behind those two contradictions of “I hate you, I love you” song by Gnash, the two sides of the so-called love, can always be surprising. What are these two sides of love? What is a true relationship?
On one hand, the love we all hear about, watch on TV, these “adorable” comments read on social media, and the love we look forward to. It is this long kiss seen in movies and the passion heard in songs. It is the happy ending in fairytales. It is the butterflies deep inside when encountering the favorite one, and the void felt when he or she is away. It is this sparkling eyes when looking at the loved one. It is this excitement and clumsiness concealed around the one. It is this electricity when touching even by mistake. This gravity, attraction, this uncontrolled strength, this generosity in time and energy, this inspiration. This madness and out of control status called “falling in love”.
On the other hand, when this “madness” in love turns to selfishness, it is the other side of love. It turns passion into confusion, it turns care into anger, and it turns separation into loneliness. It is “the other side of love” song by Sean Paul. It is this poison, this love addiction which starts to turn into dependence. This unity that turns into restrictions and transparency into an obligation. When problems start to crumble and fights start to destroy.
These are the two sides of, the so-called, love nowadays. However, it is not always the case. The pure conception of never-ending love is in (1 Corinthians 13:4-8): “4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails.” True love is a decision taken every day, it is sacrifice, it is a learnt process. Love is weakness and strength because true love gives freedom. Love is giving a part of your life, giving time. It is a process of becoming a better version of yourself for your loved one. It is not asking for change. Love is communication, it is a common ground, it is compromise. It not always rainbows and butterflies but love is not affected by circumstances, it is what keeps us steady in this unstable life.
In a nutshell, this “in love” state is temporary, it could turn to confusion or boredom one day, according to “5 love languages” by Gary chapman this “in love obsession” is in average 2 to 5 years. So what comes next? Love is a journey, a lesson, a never-ending lesson and self-development which is accompanied with the loved one’s support.
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